The other day as I was walking to work, I was thinking, "If were to meet another person with a brain injury and on the off-chance that they asked me for advice/what had helped me the most, what would I tell them?" I came up with 3 things, and actually, they all complement each other.
#1: Get a good night sleep, consistently. Granted, this is generally NOT easy for someone with a brain injury to accomplish, but when it can be done it pays enormous dividends! On days when I didn't sleep well, I wake up tired, and somewhat slump through the day thinking, "How soon can I go to bed tonight?' Days when I did sleep well, I'm happier and I get more done.
#2: Get regular exercise/physical activity. Regular exercise benefits my physical and mental health and well-being. I look better, I have mor energy, I'm happier with how I look. I'm less stressed and frustrated when I can release my emotions through exercise. Most importantly, I sleep SO much better on nights when I exercised during the day. I sleep deeper and longer.
#3: Being grateful especially for the small things in life. On my other blog, I started doing a post every day of things I was grateful for that day and it has made a huge difference for me. There are parts of life that I may wish were different, less challenging, etc but when I look back on all the good from that day, I find myself thinking, "How can I be upset with so much good in my life?"
How to do these things- as I don't believe any of them are easy to do.......
1-develop a sleep routine that works for you and stick to it. Get exercise/activity during the day
2-Find some exercise/activity that you enjoy doing. On days when life is full, make it a game to see how much time you can make for exercise that day. Save a favorite show/song to watch/listen to while you exercise.
3-Make/keep a list of all that you are grateful for so you don't forget! Look for the good. If you look for it, you'll find it!
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Rembering the Good Things- A Useful Strategy
When my emotions have been up and down, (as they have been of late) repeatedly a strategy has been of use to me. Remembering the good things/things I am grateful for and then making a record of it. For me, it has been very important to have a record of it because otherwise I forget, and when there IS a record, I can look back on it/read it during the more trying times. It can be recorded in a notebook, journal, blog, camera/picture, etc. Whatever is easiest for you.
It has also been helpful because it helps me put things in perspective- was one event, disagreement, awkward moment, etc really as important with all the other good things going on around it? It reminds me to let stuff go and look at the bigger picture (NOTE: that is not to say that I have mastered the art of "letting go" of things. I haven't. But it helps!)
It also makes me appreciate the small things that much more. The other night I had dinner at my parents house and my Mom made cheese quesadillas for dinner (I helped). It was good but after writing it down, remembering how I felt being with my family, how good the food was, I appreciated it that much more!
This is not just a strategy for the sunny days, but for ANY day, challenging or not. On the days when I want to quit, scream, etc. I try to make being grateful into a "game" How many things can I find to be grateful for today- often I can find a lot, if I choose to look for it!
Not to make light of life's heartbreaks, challenges, disappointments, etc. Trust me. I have been there. But while we can't choose everything in life, we can choose how we feel. And choosing to feel grateful and appreciative has helped me a LOT.
Live. Laugh. Love. Learn. And then make a record of it!
It has also been helpful because it helps me put things in perspective- was one event, disagreement, awkward moment, etc really as important with all the other good things going on around it? It reminds me to let stuff go and look at the bigger picture (NOTE: that is not to say that I have mastered the art of "letting go" of things. I haven't. But it helps!)
It also makes me appreciate the small things that much more. The other night I had dinner at my parents house and my Mom made cheese quesadillas for dinner (I helped). It was good but after writing it down, remembering how I felt being with my family, how good the food was, I appreciated it that much more!
This is not just a strategy for the sunny days, but for ANY day, challenging or not. On the days when I want to quit, scream, etc. I try to make being grateful into a "game" How many things can I find to be grateful for today- often I can find a lot, if I choose to look for it!
Not to make light of life's heartbreaks, challenges, disappointments, etc. Trust me. I have been there. But while we can't choose everything in life, we can choose how we feel. And choosing to feel grateful and appreciative has helped me a LOT.
Live. Laugh. Love. Learn. And then make a record of it!
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Questions and Answers
Here's a sampling of questions I have been asked over the years regarding my brain injury....
Why were you not diagnosed until you 21?
As has been previously mentioned, the brain injury occurred between 0-2 years of age, the diagnosis not until age 21. There are two main reasons for that (1)Brain injury/special education was not as recognized/respected as it is today. My Mom took me to the dr many times between 0-5 yrs but there was always an explanation for my behavior. I was the baby of the family, I was just shy, I would catch up, etc. (2) I didn't want "help" My parents got me involved in resource classes, math tutors, speech therapy, etc. but I fought all of it. I already struggled socially and didn't want to feel "different" any more than I already did and I didn't want to be "fixed". When I did finally find a dr and treatment center (Dr Nilsson at the Neurodevelopment Center) I felt ready because I was older and more mature but also because I felt the focus was on the "Claire the person" and not on "fixing Claire."
What was your reaction to the diagnosis?
My initial reaction was RELIEF!!! I had been carrying around a LOT of guilt for many years. Since I didn't know the "logic" for my behavior, I assumed that if I just tried harder I wouldn't have challenges and so the challenges were mainly because I just wasn't trying hard enough. Not true. My 2nd thought was that if I had made it 21 years with this challenge, I wanted to use my experiences to help other people- the main reason why I pursued special education.
Do you wish you had been diagnosed sooner?
Honestly, yes. Particularly regarding high school and beginning college experiences I wish I had known more then about how to get along in social setting and just developing basic life skills. BUT because I didn't know I had challenges, I thought I could do anything! And the good things that have happened because of it far outweigh "what might have been" So I don't dwell on it, I just try to celebrate what I do know.
What has been the most challenging and the most helpful?
The most challenging has been dealing with "neurogenic irritability"- having difficulty controlling my emotions at times, having a lower threshold for stress and anxiety, and ultimately the ways that these have effected my life. The most helpful medically wise has been sessions of Neurofeedback that have retrained my brain waves and ultimately helped to function more smoothly. The biggest help emotionally/people wise: People who genuinely have listened to me when I share my challenges and triumphs and tried to understand the "logic" of my behavior.
If there are any more questions you would like to ask me- please feel free to leave them in the comments section! Your feedback helps to improve the blog. Thanks!!!
Why were you not diagnosed until you 21?
As has been previously mentioned, the brain injury occurred between 0-2 years of age, the diagnosis not until age 21. There are two main reasons for that (1)Brain injury/special education was not as recognized/respected as it is today. My Mom took me to the dr many times between 0-5 yrs but there was always an explanation for my behavior. I was the baby of the family, I was just shy, I would catch up, etc. (2) I didn't want "help" My parents got me involved in resource classes, math tutors, speech therapy, etc. but I fought all of it. I already struggled socially and didn't want to feel "different" any more than I already did and I didn't want to be "fixed". When I did finally find a dr and treatment center (Dr Nilsson at the Neurodevelopment Center) I felt ready because I was older and more mature but also because I felt the focus was on the "Claire the person" and not on "fixing Claire."
What was your reaction to the diagnosis?
My initial reaction was RELIEF!!! I had been carrying around a LOT of guilt for many years. Since I didn't know the "logic" for my behavior, I assumed that if I just tried harder I wouldn't have challenges and so the challenges were mainly because I just wasn't trying hard enough. Not true. My 2nd thought was that if I had made it 21 years with this challenge, I wanted to use my experiences to help other people- the main reason why I pursued special education.
Do you wish you had been diagnosed sooner?
Honestly, yes. Particularly regarding high school and beginning college experiences I wish I had known more then about how to get along in social setting and just developing basic life skills. BUT because I didn't know I had challenges, I thought I could do anything! And the good things that have happened because of it far outweigh "what might have been" So I don't dwell on it, I just try to celebrate what I do know.
What has been the most challenging and the most helpful?
The most challenging has been dealing with "neurogenic irritability"- having difficulty controlling my emotions at times, having a lower threshold for stress and anxiety, and ultimately the ways that these have effected my life. The most helpful medically wise has been sessions of Neurofeedback that have retrained my brain waves and ultimately helped to function more smoothly. The biggest help emotionally/people wise: People who genuinely have listened to me when I share my challenges and triumphs and tried to understand the "logic" of my behavior.
If there are any more questions you would like to ask me- please feel free to leave them in the comments section! Your feedback helps to improve the blog. Thanks!!!
Monday, November 1, 2010
Laughing at Myself
Recently I relearned the importance of being able to laugh at oneself. I am by no means an expert at this- I have habits of getting embarrassed to easily and then holdig on to it longer than is necessary. BUT the times when I can laugh at myself, I feel more spring in my step, I smile more because I have something funny to laugh about and it gives me new eyes/perspective for a situation.
As an example of something to laugh about it, here is one of recent "adventures"..... Enjoy a good laugh at my expense, I don't mind!!!
THIS is Why I don't make Jello
I have made jello approximately 3 times in the past 10 years. So when I recently signed up to bring a jello salad to a church function, I tried to seek out info from more experienced jello makers. But I couldn't reach my Mom or sisters to ask for advice. I had to go it alone.
All went pretty well until the 2 minute boiling period when the ruby red liquid spilled onto the burner and stovetop. (My mom told me later that she doesn't let it keep boiling, she just takes it off the stove and stirs. And well..... now I know....) However the boiling water/jello mix caused smoke which caused the smoke alarm to go off for the first time. Yes, the first time.
I did get the jello poured in the dripper pan but not without spilling more on the white countertops. I put in the fridge and busied myself with other tasks when the fire alarm went off. Again. I thought, "What the.....?" Then I turned around and saw 4-5 inch flames shooting from the stovetop burner.
I had forgotten to turn off the burner so the spilled liquid had dried in lumps and were now flaming. Nice. I poured baking soda and put out the fire. (Turns out baking soda really does work to put out a fire!) Opened doors, windows and turned on fans. Still have not cleaned off the burner because of the intense mess that I made. Maybe if I stall long enough it'll clean itself???
Was this my finest hour? Not necessarily, but it has quickly become a favorite story about myself because as embarrassing as it may be, WHO makes jello and consecutively starts a fire??? So even though laughing at yourself may not come naturally, do it anyway. It pays off!!!
What recent life adventures can YOU find to laugh about?
As an example of something to laugh about it, here is one of recent "adventures"..... Enjoy a good laugh at my expense, I don't mind!!!
THIS is Why I don't make Jello
I have made jello approximately 3 times in the past 10 years. So when I recently signed up to bring a jello salad to a church function, I tried to seek out info from more experienced jello makers. But I couldn't reach my Mom or sisters to ask for advice. I had to go it alone.
All went pretty well until the 2 minute boiling period when the ruby red liquid spilled onto the burner and stovetop. (My mom told me later that she doesn't let it keep boiling, she just takes it off the stove and stirs. And well..... now I know....) However the boiling water/jello mix caused smoke which caused the smoke alarm to go off for the first time. Yes, the first time.
I did get the jello poured in the dripper pan but not without spilling more on the white countertops. I put in the fridge and busied myself with other tasks when the fire alarm went off. Again. I thought, "What the.....?" Then I turned around and saw 4-5 inch flames shooting from the stovetop burner.
I had forgotten to turn off the burner so the spilled liquid had dried in lumps and were now flaming. Nice. I poured baking soda and put out the fire. (Turns out baking soda really does work to put out a fire!) Opened doors, windows and turned on fans. Still have not cleaned off the burner because of the intense mess that I made. Maybe if I stall long enough it'll clean itself???
Was this my finest hour? Not necessarily, but it has quickly become a favorite story about myself because as embarrassing as it may be, WHO makes jello and consecutively starts a fire??? So even though laughing at yourself may not come naturally, do it anyway. It pays off!!!
What recent life adventures can YOU find to laugh about?
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